Wednesday, October 19, 2011

TAE, why didn't you "Highly Recommend" me?

Most members-only sites have a system in place that allows providers and hobbyists to verify each other. As I am a provider, I'll limit this post to the scenario where a hobbyist requests a recommendation from a provider. The choice of possible responses usually goes something like this:

No, I have not seen this member.
I have seen this member, and do NOT recommend (WARNING!)
I have seen this member, YMMV (your mileage may vary), barely recommend
Yes, I have seen this member, and I recommend 
Yes, I have seen this member, and I HIGHLY recommend

Other providers will check the hobbyist's references before booking an appointment with him, so it is important that we choose our response carefully.

The hobbyist can view his own references as well. This is only fair, but it sometimes can create a little drama. Sometimes I get an email that says something like "TAE, I thought we had a nice time together. I was on time and used good manners, why did you only 'recommend' me instead of 'highly recommend'?"

My response is truthful while being tactful, but I will tell you, dear reader, what I really want to say. "A "highly recommend" tells other providers that you were the ideal client. Ideal includes reaching into your wallet at the end of our session and tipping me for providing excellent service, as I always do. Yes, I appreciate that you were prompt, well-groomed, and polite, and that our time together was pleasant, but you do not get extra points simply for being an adequate client. You get extra points for also being a gracious and generous one. I mean, would you stiff your waiter? Your hair stylist? Your cab driver? Or even your paper carrier? Maybe you would, but that makes you a horrible, horrible person. Bottom line is that if you want me to be so over the moon about my date with you that I "Highly Recommend" you to my sister providers, don't be a cheap bastard!